Tuesday, July 25, 2017

Perfectionism

Teacher. Nurse. Cheerleader. Caregiver. There are so many titles that come with being a Mom- along with a lot of expectations. Hero. Professional chef. Entertainment guru. Coupon clipper. Someone who has their crap together 100% of the time. Well, believe me when I say, I struggle with all of those things, especially the latter.

It’s hard trying to be everything for everyone all the time. It seems like no matter what I do, it’s just not enough. Not enough time, not enough energy, so on and so forth. Growing up, I thought my Mom was “wonder woman.” She cooked, she cleaned, she worked, she did it all & I expected to the be the same type of Mom. Thinking about it now, I can see that I let those expectations shape my emotions & how I saw myself. I was bound and determined to be like her because I thought I needed to be, otherwise, I wasn’t going to cut it.
When I did become a Mom, I vowed to be the “perfect” one. Instead of remembering who I was called to be (exactly who God created), I let my perfectionism and this vision of it take over my mind. I stopped finding my own self-worth & I forgot that who I am is not defined by being a perfect Mom or person; because there is no such thing!

Do I make mistakes? All the time. Do I get angry & frustrated? Yep! Do I burn the food or forget to change the laundry loads? You bet! But I also love my friends & my family with every fiber of my being, I’m loyal to a fault, generous, & kindhearted. Do I parent differently than my Mom? For the most part. Do I still think she’s wonder woman? Absolutely! But I also know that it’s okay to be ME. It’s okay to make mistakes, to let the laundry sit in the washer a little too long, to forget to unload the dishwasher. What’s most important is that I know that no matter what type of mom, wife, friend, or family member that I am good enough to be in that role. I’d rather love with my whole heart, learn life lessons, & be exactly who I am anyway. I’m imperfectly perfect & I’m okay with that.

Whoops

I am literally the worst at posting to this blog. I've been continuously telling myself that I will get around to doing it & before I know it, months have passed. I did journal the other night in a notebook. It was nice to just write freely. Sometimes that's all it takes is just a few minutes to yourself to just express your feelings, just enjoy the minute, or just catch your breath. I will post what I journaled after this.

I notice lately that the more I get involved in everything, the happier I am. I'm completely overwhelmed & I cant stand that I dont spend every minute with Joey, but I genuinely love being apart of something. Whether it's coaching, volunteering, Miss Armada, etc. It brings me happiness to do those things. The only thing completely holding me back from going full bore into that, is my husband. I'm a stay at home Mom and of course my number one priority is my son, but I do need me time, too, right? I consider my "me" time a combination of what I listed above, getting a massage, taking a nap, or reading a book. Reading is my passion, I absolutely love it but that falls to the wayside next to being a Mom, a wife, a coach, & so on and so forth. And, I cant seem to find a good book that totally captures my attention either, which is obviously an issue in and of itself. So, if you have any suggestions in the romance or mystery genres, let me know!

Anywho, the point of this post is this: Whether you're a stay at home Mom or you work full time, or you dont have kids at all, take time out for YOU! Do something that you love, even if it's just for 30 minutes a day, or 10 minutes, whatever time you can get in. It's so important to be passionate about something and to know that you deserve to take the time out and explore whatever brings you happiness.